Chapter 13. Love, Hate and Revenge

13

David took a long breath before he continued; "One day, I saw a man a woman came out of the house, got into the car and drove away. I assumed it was Jillian and James. Thinking the house was empty, I poured fuel around the house and burnt it down" 



I took a deep sharp breath, he shook his head in despair, 

 "It wasn't long before the house started to flare. And to my surprise, James's car pulled near the burning house and he was alone. His face was pale like a ghost and he ran towards the door screaming 'Jillian!!! Jillian' and when the firemen stopped him he kept screaming 'my wife is in there!!'" 

David sighed and shrugged, it was as though he was living that moment of terror once again. I saw his face turning pale, 

"the blood rushed out of my head, I went blank for a moment. I forgot to breath. I can’t comprehend what's going on. Jillian is in there??? was my first thought that came after the blank..."

"I ran as fast as I could towards the house. While most of the firemen were holding James away from the house, I could easily dash into the burning house. I went through the house and the fire and the smoke, I couldn't see clearly, but it didn’t matter... I remembered the house well.


"I ran straight to the main bed room... and there she was, bending over the bed side table, rumbling through the drawers. I called out her name telling her that we need to get out, I pulled her but she pushed me away and went back to the drawer. She said she needed to get her treasure or some sort. When she at last got what she needed she looked at me and gave a faint smile as though she just realized I was there and she fell to my arms. 
 I carried her out, I thought I had saved her, but she sustained too much burn wounds and she had a miscarriage and bleeding. She was alive when I brought her out but she died in the ambulance on the way to the hospital." David closed his eyes. I could see sorrow and pain in his face. 



"I'm so sorry to hear that." I said. He shook his head. 



"What made it more heart breaking than anything else was when I carried her out, once we were out, she looked at me and smiled weakly, she called out my name in a her soft voice and she reached my hand with hers and handed me what was in her hand. The thing she risked her life for.


"It was a chain, the chain I had given her on our first anniversary. It had a pendulum on it where a picture of me and her was in the two sided pendulum."



David sighed.

"She still loved me... she loved me till the end. Yes, she left me for comfort, but she never stopped loving me. The thing she risked her life for, the thing she valued more than life was the identification of my love for her...


"I couldn't breath, my lungs collapsed, my mind stopped working. I wanted nothing more than death to come get me at that time."

Chapter 12. Life

12

“We finished collage together and I started a business with my best friend, James. My parents wanted me to join them again on their quests, but I wanted a simple normal life. 

I married Jillian not long after we graduated, and my business was rocketing fast. My work and personal life couldn't balance each other. I was ambitious, I wanted to be no one so I worked hard and gave more than just half of me to my work. 

 I used to go places and travel for my business. In my ego to be number one, I forgot about my loving, caring, always faithful wife. 

 For more than 15 years we were married, we never had any kids, although she wanted one badly. For more than 15 years, she kept quiet when I placed my work ahead of her. I guess even the strongest of stones would still crack under an enormous pressure." he sighed.

"The continuation is as any drama series; She had an affair with James and decided to leave me for him." he sighed again

 I rubbed his shoulder; I knew that pain, heard about it a million times. Pain and hurt that love, guilt, rejection and regrets bring.

"When all that came down, I became a drunk, a mean one. I wanted to wash away all the pain, and I kept drinking. I lost my wife, my life, my work, my house, my everything, until what was left was the clothes on me."

"But it wasn't until I found out she was pregnant with his kid that my rage became uncontrollable. Before I could stop myself, hatred wrapped around me and I was indulge in avenging them,” he sighed. For a moment I saw his dull eyes radiates pain and sorrow. Then he looked at me and forced a smile. 

 "Things you do in rage is like nailing a wall, you can be sorry for it later and take out the nail, but the hole stays. So will the scars. Remember that bella, next time your rage urge you into harming others, stop and don’t let your emotions control you."

 I nodded. He sighed again, "I wish I had someone to remind me about that at that time. Looking at their lives, jealousy ate me up! That was supposed to be me! That's supposed to be my life, my wife, my home, my kid!... all these thoughts buzzed in my head. I wanted it back! And if I can't have it, they shouldn't have it too, was what I thought." 

I felt a chill ran down my spine, I had a feeling I wouldn't like the next part.

Chapter 11. David

11

When I reached the park David was already there. He smiled and asked about my day. I smiled and told him how I enjoyed my day. David closed his eyes while listening; he would nod once in a while or smile and giggle. It was as though he was imagining what I was telling him behind his closed eyes.

There was something about him that was so calming, since the first day I met him, I felt that, and I realized that the past few days, he was the reason of my smiles, he and his box of candies. 

I stopped telling my story and just stared at him, he opened his eyes and looked at me with curiosity. 

 "What is it gorgeous?" he asked
.

I shook my head. I really didn't know what to tell him. He stopped me from taking my own life, he encouraged me to reconnect with my family, and he brought me back to my pass and then taught me how to enjoy the present. He showed me so many colors that I never realized existed. 

At the moment, he seemed to me as a guardian angel sent from above. 



Where did he come from anyways, what did he do? He seemed so mysterious. 

I was going to ask him to tell me something about his personal life when, as though reading my thoughts, he started his narration. 

 "You know bella, when I was young, I did some pretty messed up things..." he started. "I was married once..." he said



"Really?" I couldn't hide my surprise. He laughed. 



"Though I was brought up with traveling hippies as parents, there was a point in my life that I was tired of living from places to places. I hated what my parents did, you know that rebellion phase..." he chuckled. 
 
 "I went to collage like any normal kids; after being home schooled all that while, I enjoyed the diversity in college. It was refreshing. And then I met Jillian... a beauty..." he smiled and closed his eyes as though remembering how pretty she was.

He then told me the story of his life.

Chapter 10. A New Perspective

10

I woke up early the next morning; the first thought that came in my head was 'aw fuck! Another school day...' I wished I could just stay in bed. But then I remembered about David and his interesting box of candies; I remembered the colors in that box, still plenty of them. 

I smiled as I recalled the first time I saw all those colors of the candies inside the box, the cantaloupe taste and my excitement when I learned each color has different taste. I wonder which candy would I taste today. 

As though that simple thought was a source of heat, the warmth radiated to my whole mind and soul. My mood was changed and I eagerly got up from my bed and got ready.

"What should I teach the kids today?' My mind wondered as I walk towards the school. I remembered when I was a kid, I hated school cause it was same old lame lectures and notes. I had wished the teachers were more creative in teaching. 

I laughed to myself as I thought at the irony; I was one of them now. 

 Maybe in English class I could tell them to act out Romeo and Juliet or something, 
hmmm having a skit about 'lord of the flies' would be fun too. What about Geography?

So deep into my thoughts, I didn't realize I was already at the front gate of the school. If it weren’t for the security guard who greeted me, I would have missed the school. 

 My first class was English for the third graders, as it was early in the morning, the students were still excited and eager to learn. It was easy to deal with them; reading out poems with intonations and actions was all it took to amuse them into learning. 

That day wasn't like any other day that I had been through as a teacher there; I was actually enjoying myself in my classes. And I realized I have missed plenty small details in my students that I have just started noticing that day.

Jenny, a girl from the second grade was very quiet because she has braces on her teeth, which made her accent a little bit weird, and thus her friends made fun of her when she spoke. 



Alfred, a boy from the third grade who was the class clown that I send to detention a lot, was actually pretty attentive and caring to his fellow classmates. 

Julia from the fourth grade has a crush on Jimmy. How I know this? She was always stealing glances at him and, I don't know how I missed this, her notebooks were all covered with "I heart J" or J loves J or J2. 


School was suddenly fun and entertaining. So many things that could surprise you, so many incidents that you would remember your whole life. I wondered how I had missed all that. 



Perhaps I had already thought school was boring and I ignored everything else. Just like David said, when you judged something you tend to create a picture in your head and could never see the real joy behind it.

Chapter 9. Call Home

9

Talking about mom and Ramon with David that day made me missed them. That night I went to the phone booth to make a call home. I called my old house number, nobody picked up. Then I called Ramon's cell phone. After waiting for two rings with my heart thumping in my ears, I heard Ramon's husky voice answering the phone. I got so nervous; I just switched it off on impulse. 
 
My heart was beating madly... I took long breaths to calm myself down and then I dialed Ramon's number again. This time when he picked up, I didn't switch it off but I kept quiet. My voice and courage to speak got caught in my throat. I just kept breathing silently, slowly. "Hello.... hello... anybody there?" Ramon asked, sounded a little annoyed. 

"Aaa.. ak..." was all I could say. There was a long silence. It was as though that much of my voice was enough for Ramon. 

 "Emma?" he asked slowly. "Is that you?"

 I nodded, not realizing he can't see me, he could only hear me. My eyes were welling up... a funny feeling ran inside of me; a mix of nostalgia, long-nes, excitement and happiness.

"Emma... where are you now? We haven't heard from you for months, Mom is missing you so much... I miss you so much!" Ramon said emphasizing on the "I". "Haven't you had enough of your traveling? We want you home, there are so many things we wanna tell you, so many things we wanna hear from you." He kept rambling, not letting me to say anything.

 "Ramon… I miss u too" I said finally before I calmed down and spoke like normal people, not like a retarded dumb.


We spoke for nearly an hour; Ramon got engaged, he was to be married in 3 months and he wanted me to come. He said he sent me e-mails and never heard any reply. Well, in my defense, I haven't got the chance to check my mails in months either. 
Ramon now works at the hospital at the city nearest to our small town, it is an hour drive there but the pay is good and Ramon is up for a promotion. In the evenings when he comes back, he has his own clinic for the town people. Ramon says he charges as less as he could, as they are part family. 

When I asked about his fiancé, he said she is a doctor too, not a surgeon though. He said sometimes she reminded him of me; she is a free spirited woman with dreams of traveling. He said he knew we would get along. Her name is Sherry and she is part writer. He told me that she makes these beautiful bangles off used tin cans. She sounded splendid but I’m not so eager to meet her. I guess it was the jealousy that she is with my brother and she would take most of his time and he wouldn't be thinking of me that much anymore. 

 Rico is dead. A love triangle thing; one of his wives shot him after finding out he had an affair although he was already married to 2 women. I guess everything has its limits, even love. Randy, his son, is the one running his business now, he was different from Rico, and he was an honest guy. 

Mom's diner is still there; it was running so well, Ramon and mom decided to expand the place. Ramon said his reception is going to be there. Then he told me how my friends from school were doing. I can hardly remember them though. He said almost every guy had gone out of the town to go get jobs in big cities and the girls were either married or traveling and living their dreams like what I'm doing. 



Not so much to my surprise, Mom is dating my old principal. Ramon had a hard time telling me this so he waited until every other thing was out. When I asked if they were going to get married, Ramon said that mom and the principal were both liberal people, they don't believe in marriages. They are living together though.

I told Ramon about my travels and my adventures. Although, I did not tell him about David, I didn't want him to worry like how all other elder brothers do. 

I had to hung up after 45 minutes, my money was running out. 

 That night I slept a peaceful sleep, I dreamt about mom, Ramon, the diner and my small town and I realize how much I missed being home.

Chapter 8. Chili Flavored Candy

8

I woke up quite early the next morning, it always happen to me after a heavy night of drinking, I would wake up early and can’t go back to sleep. I wore my bikini and went to the beach to have a dip. It was my cure for hang over’s, swimming in the beach or the pool. After half an hour of battling the waves, I lay down on the soft sand and fell asleep. When I woke up, the sun was high and I was burning like a cooked lobster. I checked my watch, it was twelve noon; still time before I gotta meet David.

I went for a quick lunch; tuna sandwich and a bottle of coca cola, and then walked my way slowly to the park.

When I reached, he was already there, smoking a joint with a big smile on his face. I sat next to him and he offered me to take a drag from his joint. It was good weed… it had been quite a while since I had a joint and the high made me feel relaxed and calmed.

“Nice eh?” He asked, I nodded lazily.

“How was your swim?” he asked nodding at my wet hair and the towel in my bag.

“It was good, the waves were good today…”

“You didn’t surf today?”

“Nah…” I answered lazily. He looked at me waiting for a reason and I realized that, “I felt like swimming...” I said simply.

He laughed and shook his head. “I should have known… most of the times everything has the simplest reasons behind it…” he said and took a good look at me and continued, “Never you forget that, Emma…”

I just listened… this was one of his wisdom talk that I like hearing, it felt like he was reminding me of the things that I have forgotten.

He took out the box of candy and once again the excitement of trying a new taste filled in me again. There was this red colored candy, it was bright red, reminded me of a nail polish color I once had. As the candy reached my tongue, I felt burning in my tongue. I spat out the candy and looked at him with a questioning face. I was thinking ‘What the F???’

“Its red chili…” he said explaining.

“Candies are suppose to be sweet, not chili.” I said rather annoyed.

He laughed and laughed. “Didn’t we just discuss about not judging a candy by its color, yesterday?” he asked in between laughter.

I raised my eyebrows at him, still annoyed I replied, “Well, I wasn’t expecting any flavor, but I certainly wouldn’t think of chili. And it’s common sense, candies are sweet, they are suppose to be sweet and chili is hot, and it’s a spice, it can’t be a flavor for a candy. There isn’t one candy factory in this whole world that would consider having a chili flavored candy!”

“Well isn’t that a well based assumption? But it is still an assumption my dear. Candies can taste like whatever the makers want them to taste, just like how the universe can let us be how it wants us to be…” he, as always, explained the meaning behind the taste of the candy I chose. It was as if he was making me choose those candies on purpose and had his speech ready for every time I took one candy.

“And assumptions bella, it can help you prepare for the worse but can be very dangerous if you stick to it without finding out the truth. Just because you were given facts and thought of things in a certain way since you were born, doesn’t mean things can’t go differently.

“For instance, you have always believed that candies would taste sweet and chili would not be a choice of flavor because all this time all the candies you had ever had were sweet and candies were treats to kids who behave well… so you assume that every candy in this world would taste sweet. But the world is huge, the universe is infinite… things are uncertain.

“Copernicus went to quest for an alternate truth behind the earth’s existence and discover that the earth was round instead of a flat plateau, then Galileo Galilei went an extra mile and discover truth behind the universe and revealed that the earth isn’t the center of the universe, the sun is, even though he was raised with a believe that the earth was flat and was the center of the universe. Galileo discover different aspects of the planets we have in our solar system and that there were more to the universe than just our solar system. And although nobody supported him and he was being treated like a criminal, he wasn’t afraid of knowing more and expands his knowledge rather than just being satisfied of what was taught. He didn’t let assumptions came in the way…” David took a long breath after finishing his story about Galileo.

“Bella, the secrets the universe holds is more magnifying than you can imagine, so never stop searching, never stop learning and never think you have reached the top…” he added with a smile. “The moment you think you have reached the top, the only way to go is down…”

“Here, take another candy… I don’t want you going back home being mad at me for not letting you have a good taste in your mouth.” He shoved the box of candies to me. I laughed and picked a dark purple colored one. It tasted of grapes.

David asked me if I kept in touch with my mother and brother and I said I did… I called them every Christmas and new years and easters and other holidays that I remembered. He then asked how long have I been away and not met them face to face, and he was surprised when I told him that ever since I left home at the age of 17, I haven’t met them once. Well I met Ramon once during my travels, we were in Barcelona at the same time, he was there for a conference and mailed me to meet him. But I only got to meet him just few hours before he left, so that didn’t really count.

David asked if I ever thought of going home to meet them, I just shrugged. I didn’t know if they still needed me, was what I thought, but I didn’t say it out loud. Then David just commented simply that they must have missed me terribly. I did not say anything to that. He left the conversation there and kept quiet. I didn’t know what else to say so I stayed quiet too. He took out another joint and light it, took a puff and passed it to me. I smiled, shook my head a little and took a long drag.

Chapter 7. Beautiful Soul and Small Eyes

7

That day I went back home feeling somehow different than how I usually feel. The small rented room I sleep in didn't seem as gloomy as it had always been.

I crashed myself onto my bed and let that foreign feeling radiates to every bit of my body, from the tip of hair to the tip of my toe. It was a Saturday night, no school tomorrow and I didn't have to wake up early. I decided to go out and see the town through some beer glasses.

I took a semi-long warm shower, put on a sexy backless green dress that showed a little of my cleavage and thighs. The wings tattooed on to my back were revealed and I liked it that way, so instead of letting my hair down, I tied it up in somewhat of a bun.

For a while I thought of calling one of my fellow teachers whom I knew always an angel at school and a devil when the weekend comes. She was a happy go lucky girl who can be pretty diplomatic. It was hard to now her real character, she was like a chameleon and turns into what she needs to be to blend in. However, I never felt threatened by her; perhaps because she never really bothered to ask about my life and pretend to be interested like most people do.

At last I decided I wanted to go alone, I took her number with me just incase I changed my mind and wanted some company.

I went to grab dinner first at a traditional serving resto that had became very popular among the youngsters. And the first person I met there was none other than Mauryn, the fellow teacher I was thinking about calling earlier. I guess it's true what they say, whisper to the universe, you'll always be heard.

She was excited to meet me, she was with some friends and her boyfriend, and knowing I went out alone; she forced me and even pleaded me to join them. Well, after all the pleading, I can't really refuse them.

The night was awesome. We went to this bar where they serve cheap wine produced in Thailand itself. The wine tasted sweet and gets you real high real quick. Mauryn knew the bar owner and everyone there, she said she hang out there most of her free time.

We drank, we danced, and we played some drinking games and drank some more. I was laughing until my cheek hurt and my stomach cramped. The night was so much fun, I did not want it to end.

At 4 a.m. when the bar finally closed and we were chased out, we went to a 24 hour mart and bought sandwiches, chips and anything we could eat, and head out to sit in the park near there. We ate our junk food waiting for the sun to rise.

"You are so much fun Emma, how come we never hung out before?" Mauryn asked with her slurry speech (still a little too drunk)

I laughed without an answer

"You know, I can see that you are a beautiful person..." she added

"Why thank you, I think my eyes are a little small, but thank you..." I said gesturing a thank you with my hand waves.

"No... Not your physical appearance, your soul... its radiant... with shiny beautiful colors." she said and started laughing and giggling.

I laughed and laughed, I didn't understand what she was trying to say and so I just laughed cause I thought it was funny.

She suddenly hugged me and kissed my cheek… “Emma, you are beautiful, your soul is so beautiful…” she said and hugged me tighter. She let me go and her hands danced around my head, “your aura… so colorful… you have been through a lot haven’t you?” she asked

“It’s funny… I met this guy earlier and he said the same thing…” I said remembering what David said earlier this afternoon.

“Awww… see, you are glowing…” she said and kissed my cheek again.

Then James, Mauryn’s boyfriend, suggested that we sneak in to one of the villas there and use the swimming pool. We all, like fools, sneaked into this huge villa and swam in our underwear’s and even skinny dipping. We sobered up after the swim and saw the sunrise then we all went to our respective homes and slept like drunken babies.